Holiday
by Cradlerobber Speedo-kun
Summary: Ishida can't tell the difference between Ichigo and Kon in Ichigo's body. Crack pairing ahead! Shounenai, KonxIshida, and implied IshidaxIchigo.


A/N: No spoilers, just crack. Written for the second challenge of the smokingbleach community on lj. Enjoy!

**Holiday**

Alright, so maybe it was because they looked similar. Not _extremely _similar, but just enough to send his synthetic hormones into circles of confusion. Similar hair, flat chests, similar eyes… He could blame that, right? And the fact that the guy was effeminate, and the girl was probably more masculine than the guy… well, of course that'd get him all mixed-up!

So the fact that he was skulking around in Ichigo's body trying to find Ishida was perfectly ok. Absolutely ok. Especially since, he reminded himself, if he ran into Rukia he'd try to put the moves on her too.

…even though there was no chance of that since she was off with Ichigo fighting a hollow. But never mind the details, it was the principle that mattered! Because the principle stated that Rukia was also acceptable, _in addition to_ Ishida. So, really, he would've been seeking both of them if Rukia weren't busy. So it was alright.

He wondered what Rukia would look like with glasses…

And then promptly turned a corner in the school corridor and slammed into Ishida. Ishida scowled, "Watch where you're going, Kurosaki. You --…"

Kon swiftly put a finger to his lips, and stared seriously into Ishida's eyes. Ishida blushed suddenly, something Kon had to admit was rather attractive. Kon then quickly grabbed him by the shoulders and hauled him around the corner, and pressed him to the wall.

"I've been looking for you…" He breathed in Ishida's ear, delighted in the fast spreading blush on Ishida's face. Ishida squirmed a little, "What are you doing? We're in the middle of the hall, someone could see!" Kon ignored his comment, and nuzzled his neck, cheerfully taking in the fact that Ishida's hands were tightening on his back. This was way easier than he had thought it would be!

"Wasn't this morning enough for today?" Ishida suddenly hissed.

"Huh?" Kon broke away, and stared. This morning? What?

Ishida's eyes narrowed, "Wait a minute… you're not Ichigo…" Ishida was not scrutinizing the spirit energy that was coming from what apparently was only Ichigo's body, and not really Ichigo. Normally he was very attentive to these things, but, hey, when you're boyfriend/rival forces you against a wall, you don't usually stop to analyze his spirit energy.

And it was then that his dork factor kicked in.

Ishida threw his arms up, and looked horrified, "WAIT! You're NOT Ichigo!(?)!(!)" (1)

Kon's eyes bugged out, "YOU did something with Ichigo this morning?(!)"

"What's going on here?"

The pair looked down the hallway to see Rukia and Ichigo (in shinigami form), and a newer, even more horrified look settled on Ishida's face. Kon promptly sprung forward towards Rukia, "'Nee-san!" A hand was slammed in his face (courtesy of Ichigo), preventing him from embracing his dear Rukia, but the view from the floor, admittedly, wasn't that bad…

If it was even possible, Ishida looked even more freaked out than he had when Rukia and Ichigo had appeared on the scene. He pointed a shuddering finger at Kon, "That's Kon!"

Ichigo gave him an irritated look, "Of course it is – I thought you and your great Quincy powers could've figured out that wasn't me." He eyed Ishida as the young man promptly passed out, sprawling out on the floor. "Che, freak…"

Rukia, meanwhile, kicked Kon in the head as he grasped her leg and made an attempt to look up her skirt. She frowned, and Ichigo scowled, "So's he… they'd be great together..."

Kon rolled onto his back, and leered up at Ichigo, "Really? But you were with him this morning…"

Rukia cast a curious look at Ichigo, who avoided her gaze, and lunged at Kon, "Hey, get out of my body, I gotta get back to class…"

As Ichigo shuffled back to class (now in his proper body), a plushie bounced down the hall, and skidded to a stop by a certain Quincy Archer. Kon smirked, and cuddled up close to Ishida's stomach, "Kon 1, Kurosaki 0."

* * *

(1) Sorry for the weird bracket-ness, but doesn't allow exclamation points and question marks right next to eachother. I dunno why, but, I had to do that to bring across what I meant for punctuation. 


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